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We're Talkin' Hoops: Iowa-Indiana LIVEGAMEOPENTHREAD

Indiana Hoosiers at Iowa Hawkeyes, Feb 19, 2012 5:00 PM CST


5pm Sunday is a weird time for a basketball game, isn't it? Or is it just me?

Anyway, Iowa heads home today after a pair of rough road losses at jNW and Penn State. Waiting for them is... Indiana. I don't think we need to discuss what happened when these two teams played a few weeks ago. Hopefully some home cooking is what the doctor ordered for Iowa basketball.

The game is at 5pm CT on BTN.

The usual open thread rules apply: no links to illegal online streams, no porn, no politics, no religion, no slurs, no douchebaggery, etc.

0 recs  |  912 comments

Comments

sounds like no Cartwright
Tough senior year for BC
May could be out too
If only Basabe were out

I’d like our chances a lot better.

YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

Basabe is killing it tonight.

Actually I think I'm going to start doubting him out loud before every game.
And Gatens is over-rated too!

No way he scores 40 a game on the way to a national title.

Well, I've already gotten my ice cream

and I’m in my seat. Now all’s I need is an Indiana skullfucking.

Also, Fuck Minnesota. I so wanted to punch a hole in my dashboard on the drive down here.

That's a lot of anger.

You might want to double on the ice cream today.

I may have to.
Got some Ben & Jerrys for later

Late Night Snack

In case it wasn't obvious,

the CHA choco-raspberry twist cone is the inspiration for my moniker.

O/U 13 Indiana offense rebounds
O/U

13 IU dunks,

13 IU 3-pointers.

Recker and Settles in the house
Suited up?

Let’s have a real good time.

Maybe they can use their combined 33 years of eligibility

to will the Hawks to victory.

tell Jess I still love him.
Since I won't be able to watch the game...

I predict Iowa will go up early, slowly lose lead but seal it in the end. If I WAS watching it, it would be a 25 pt clusterfucklosstogoddamnindiana. So, again, I will not be watching.

That, and I don’t have a tv.

Sorry about your luck

but I don’t think you’re allowed to watch basketball games anymore.

I'm tempted to get NBA League Pass just so I can watch Jeremy Lin play every night.

If he keeps this up I don’t think I will ever get fed up with watching him.

I can’t believe that I’m actually cheering for a New York sports team, it feels dirty.

Yeah it's too bad Lin couldn't play for Milwaukee or somewhere where everyone isn't a d-bag
The only redeeming thing about him playing in NYC

is Madison Square Garden does make the best stage for this whole thing to take place.

If he played in Milwaukee

You’d never hear of him.

Yep.

There is no ESPN Milwaukee.

I saw there were some inappropriate things said about him by ESPN announcers

Anyone know anything? I just saw some statement by ESPN on their website.

ESPN mobile, some ESPN anchor, and a guest on ESPN radio

all three used a racial slur in separate incidents. The internet guy was fired, the TV guy was suspended for a month, and the other guy didn’t work for ESPN.

ESPN.com put up a bad headline or banner or whatever

that said “Chink in the Armor” for the night when NY lost and Lin had 8 turnovers.

Indiana favored by 5

damn you Vegas, every time I think I’m out, you suck me right back in.

I wish I was excited for this game, but...

Please, oh please Hawks, make me excited!

I've seen the future and

RDM’s going to go all Linsane on everyone for 28 & 14. And Gus is there to call it.

Does that help?

It always helps.
Yes, yes it does.

I guess it begins with the fact that I have the game on tv.

Wait, an Iowa basketball game that I don't have to illegally stream on my 14" computer?

I thought the day would never come.

No kidding.

Poor ESPNU.

Thursday's game is on ESPN2!
Gus in the house?
It's less exciting knowing that all his good calls are going to be

about Zellar throwing down in Basabe’s face.

Buck up, Sunshine.

Perhaps we might’ve made some adjustments in the interim.

That is a purple tie.
Two purple ties
They wear yellow or red ties

to jNW games.

Always the UNI apologist, Chazz

err, something.

Good game guaranteed.

Long live the Gus Johnson Effect.

Tom Crean, the creepy factor is the charts
Looks like a good crowd on hand.
Yeah.

Looks pretty full.

Crean is 48-72 at Indiana

Crazy!

And 2-5 against Iowa.

Nice.

F me

Ted Valentine.

Officials are: Ted Valentine, Mike Eades, Scott Thornley.

Valentine did the OSU-Michigan game last night.

This looks familiair
Welp

Looks like we’re effectively covering Zeller so far.

might want to guard that zeller guy
McCabe right on pace with the early foul.
This is going to be a long evening
Cody Zeller layup.

Anyone keeping track go dunks and layups?

2 so far

Tim McCormick logic says Zeller is on pace for 80 layups

Maybe don't leave Zeller wide open like that.
off topic, but I found 3 bottles of TR at Dahls in Johnston

excited

Nice.

I’m having one now myself. On the rocks. Yum.

I really think Olaseni is our best option for defending the post.
Nice pile jump by McCabe!
Is it weird that I really, really hate that Elston guy?
Is he the one that is uneven b/c he has all of his tats on one side?
yes

and he acts like every foul against him is the greatest injustice in history

He looks like someone but I can't put my finger on who.

I’m not sure it’s a bball player.

Nope,

that face is uber-punchable.

Travel, McCabe.

We are so bad inside. Seriously, put in Settles and Reiner.

Need to get Hulls in foul trouble

That kid is a problem behind the arc.

yay. I like when they call fouls on the other team
sure, now Oglesby can make a FT
2 McCabe fouls in less than 40 seconds.
Well, it was fun Zach
welp

There goes McCabe

McCabe=a foul a minute
And just like that

McCabe has two fouls

Hmm, w/ another 20 lbs or so Oglesby is going to be really attractive.
I tried to follow that theory

I don’t think it worked

Oglesby is cute now but if he gains a little weight/muscle or Gatens/May arms I will find him attractive.

I like my boys w/ a little meat on their bones.

TWCWS
I like this. I think we should start this meme. Screw TWSS, TWCWS all the way. Make sure you show Chazz.
In fairness, somebody used TWCS earlier this weekend after one of my comments

(I assume it meant That’s What Chazz Said.)

I think they both can be used.
I think it is appropriate to use them both.
Goddammit, Glen!

…I mean, Zach.

This early playing time is interrupting Basabe's early game nap.
Melyawn Bazzzzzabe.
2 on hulls!
I don't think that was a good call
This game is set to end at 9:45.
I'm...not quite sure that was foul.

Welp! I’ll take it!

There has been a rash of flopping in college hoops over the last week or two.
Oglesby...

and hits!

Which Hoser was it that came in late first half last time and killed us with 3's?

I believe he was a PF.

Well that series of events went much better than expected.
Is this that defense thing I've heard about it?
IU isn't playing much.
I guess you're right

if the technical definition of “playing” does not include passing the ball to the cheerleaders

Baaasaaaabeeeee
Holy fucking shit!

That was awesome!

Ok. That was pretty freakin sweet.

Nice follow by Basabe.

Gatens should have gone up with that one.
to my admittedly untrained eyes

this looks like exactly the same press that ended in INFINITY DUNKS last time, but they have like 3 turnovers already this time.

Well, if you get them to turn it over

before they find the guy open under the hoop, you win.

Note to self:

Don’t put a Barca game on the same time as Iowa basketball. I can’t take my eyes away.

The Hoosiers are such shit on the road

Obvious statement is obvious.

Wow!

Who’s that team with the white jerseys?

Well

this has been unexpectedly awesome!

Too awesome too early,

I’m liking it.

Gatens has mastered

The pump fake and dribble pull up mid range shot

The atmosphere in here is electric right now.

God, how I’ve missed this.

Melsahn Basabe

Is a different player today.

Basabe going insane!
Basbinity?
wait, duh.

Mel-sahnity

I'm typing that every time you don't, today.

Just so you know.

I am all for it.

I have to go to a dinner soon and will have to watch the DVR box.

We have not seen this Basabe all year.

Not Once.

where has this basabe been all year?
Didn't you see his purity ring earlier in the season?

He was saving himself, but I think I saw him take it off during the pre-game.

That sequence was so intense.
I take back the bad things I've been saying about Melsahn all year.

We should find him in the post right now.

Wow

That was like 3 fouls and Basabe still got it.

Call...

None of the fouls!

The Stokes kid is coming in.

What?

and picks up a foul
LOLOLOLOL

And then he fouls immediately.

BEST DARN CONFERENCE IN AMERICA
Someone's gonna get hurt/in a fight if this keeps up
Jeez, basabe is playing with some intensity.
Brommer, Stokes, Olaseni

Uh oh

where's b-stubbs?
Never fear

Hes on his way

Why no Archie?
Not since he talked back to Fran a few games ago.
Brommer oh my word.
I think this is the WTF lineup
Or the "refs aren't calling anything, everyone get your murdering in" lineup
Fucking Seven Nation Army chant.
Better than Sweet Caroline

which they will do later.

I asked them to stop it via twitter b/c this is not Penn State football circa 2008.

I’d rather have Sweet Caroline any day.

Omg Brommer did things.
Omg was that competent defense by Andrew Brommer?
Zeller just grabbed Olaseni and dragged him to the floor

with no call. What the hell is going on here refs?

Brommer doesn't have a foul yet
Over the back!!!!
OVER THE FUCKING BACK
Whoa... Hold the phone.
What the fuck kind of foul call was that?
CHA is going to be very pissed many times today.
this officiating is interesting
Stubbs coming in
he's gonna put on a clinic
with his black shoes
What's Fran doing?

He must have a plan.

Wear em down by constantly pressing, pushing, and running

And we don’t have the horses to do that with our normal rotation.

Maybe the plan is

“fuck the plan. Let’s run until we win or we puke.”

ok, someone explain what Over the back is to me
It no longer exists, apparently.

Also, blocking someone out is a foul (sometimes, when the official feels like it’s a foul)

Usually, it means

you are in good rebounding position, and someone behind you jumps up and on you to get the ball.

But you were probably joking, right?

not a basketball guy

i dont know what most of these calls are. put the ball in the basket is all i know

So two starters are injured, and Fran has already gone nine deep.

Is this sixth grade basketball where everybody gets equal playing time?

Worked for Dr. Tom.
I know.

It always drove me nuts though. Just when someone got hot, he’d pull him. Clearly he knew hat he was doing though.

Well, if the guy is hot, but can't run on D, give him a break.
with Dr. Tom

they could pull themselves and reinsert themselves.

Really?

I didn’t know that.

yup

with the pace he expected if someone needed a break they could sub for themselves and then go back in when they were ready.

twss?
How you doin' Jess?

I will allow it.

Defense bad right now.
damn, they're just letting 'em play
But then they're calling the dumbest fouls when they do call em

Carver sounds like it’s in full WTF is going on mode.

and this is different from how the Big Ten has been for how many years?
It's usually in favor of the home team though.
Crean bitching at the refs . . . seriously dude?
Are you really surprised?

That’s the kind of guy he is.

When does John Lickliter come in?
After the whistle, when some sweat needs mopped up.
no Archie though right?
Hangovers at 2:30 in the afternoon are the worst.
It's 5:30

and I agree.

Do you live in the Pacific ocean?
Not that I know of.
Damn.

I hoped I was talking to some sort of fish-person.

I'd rather not have Stubbs in the game
I know White is getting all the Freshman love right now

but I really like Oglesby’s game.

Heathcote. Vomit.
Someday, I'll be able to afford a nice Heathcoat.

That time we looked like we actually understand how to play zone defense.
Wasn't Valentine banned from the Big Ten for a few years?
Mel is killin it
Beautiful jump-hook.
Good god

How long are Aaron White’s arms?

Just short of long enough to box with God.
Reminds me of...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15wZeEJWKxc

Well, that's a horrible clip.

I couldn’t find one that actually showed the guy;s arms

does the btn journey promo

give you the idea we might have a little Gat3ns?

Why is Iowa not leading by more of the points?

I feel like we should be leading by more of the points by now.

Holy shit BTN

they’re “crowd-vertising”

That dude Randy made that commercial
A friend just told me about the Utah State superfan Wild Bill the other day.

How the hell did I not know about this guy? He’s awesome!

Is McCabe going to sit out the entire 1st half?
Ogelsby

Is it just me or is he really not that good of a shooter?

Give him time.

He’s no Kingsbury, but he’s as good as any 3-pt shooter we have, perhaps save Gatens.

I know.. he is young
And Fran makes good Kool-aid.
That would've been a destructive dunk.
I like the turnovering.
Mel has the hook today

Beautiful.

Basabe, where you been?
He was waiting for Gus to come back to Carver.
Haha, I just said something similar on tweeter.
He's just being Mel-born again.

That was really bad, I’m sorry.

Save that joke for Johnny Mullings
He might never get to use it for Mullings, though
Usually, Melsahn just makes us say

Aussie Aussie Aussie OY OY OY :(

MELSAHN-I-T-Y!!!!!!!
Bitch, keep givin' me the jump-hook!
Guys

this is crazy!

USE THE COURT AS YOUR SANCTUARY
Fran McCaffery to hire Gus Johnson as an assistant coach after this game.
Is there a crowd at Carver?

I don’ t hear one.

It was loud earlier.
They are chanting something I can't make out during freethrows.
I'm loving the hustle today.
This game is frenetic.

Which is probably good for us.

Gabe Olaseni

Your scapegoat for the evening.

needs to keep his finger out of his nose
Tower of London was all "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

And then they went back to Zeller and he was all “lol whatever bro”

Did you make up that nickname?

Because A+

I wish.

Someone else coined it for Gabe a few games ago.

No

I’m pretty sure it was you.

I think it might have been Mexican't

But hey, I’ll steal the credit if you insist…

Apparently the refs hate British people.
Ted Valentine still remembers the War of 1812, homie.

NEVER FORGET

Is Brommer still

Foul free?

Gabe is taking them for him.
Student section chanting Tyler at Zeller.

Pretty funny.

OMFG

DOUBLE CLUTCH. KOBE

My word. How did that get in.
This game.

THIS GAME.

GAAAOOOH!

-Gus Johnson

Roy Marble

DRINK.

Glad they called that travel. They haven't been doing that much lately.
Archie with the dime.

DEVON-I-T-Y!

So how much is Indiana murderkilling

us….
HOLY FUCK WHAT IS GOING ON?

Indiana is garbage on the road?
debbie downer over here
Just keeping it real man, keeping it real.
Statistics are statistics
I know sir.

However, Indiana is still ranked. We are winning. I will not write off this team performing well just because a team is “garbage on the road” This shit is exciting no matter who the opponent is, wherever they are playing. It doesn’t matter.

Oglesby with his best Chris Kingsbury impression
Fuck you zeller
"And the Hawkeyes are poppin their collars now!"

-Gus Johnson

I don't know what that means but I liked it!
We don't do that in Iowa, Gus.
We do, we're just late to the party!

/eastcoastbias’d

Didnt some IU students actually make a youtube vid about poppin collars?
When I was in school, popping one's collar was a very widely used

stereotype for a toolish Chicago suburbanite.

Magnificent DUNK FAIL HOOSIER
More like TyLOLer ZeLOLer
Woooooo! Young Fella. Confidence!
Gus Johnson is the best in the goddam business.

Sometimes I think to myself “Is Gus Johnson overrated?” And then I watch him cast a game with my favorite team playing, and I realize that he isn’t and scold myself for having such imPUUUUUURE thoughts.

making a beer run to the kum and go at halftime

don’t know what I should get

Something with

Barley, malt and hops.

yeast ROCKS!
Well, unless you get the yeastie beasties.
Probably Hiland Light.
retch
Steel Reserve
Seriously though, been dying to try the Sam Adams

Alpine spiring

not bad

a little on the light/sweet side but for a spring beer it is another quality product from SA

it's terrible
Really? How?

I haven’t had it yet, so I’m interested in opinions.

it takes like dishwater

with lemon

I believe you.

Generally I enjoy most Sam Adams products. Don’t like Cherry Wheat, and Cranberry Lambic. Don’t like fruit in my beer. For a “major” microbrew, they usually make great beer.

You have to get Cherry Wheat really cold.

Otherwise, tastes pretty bad.

Sorry, it tastes bad even really cold.

At least to me. Yuck. Wayyyyy too sweet.

So I'm guessing you're not a big fan of Leinie's BerryWeiss.
EXACTLY.

I love Leinenkugel beer. I live about 90 minutes from the brewery, and all Leinie’s beer=good, except Berry. Terrible. And light. Yuck.

It's getting decent reviews I guess

I had one at the Casino last night and will never order it again

http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/35/76571

Sounds nice.

Sometimes I need a reprieve from the slew of bocks that are available this time of year. I love ’em, but they can be heavy and CAN get old after a month of heavy consumption.

30-21 good guys w/ 3 min to go 'til HT
I think we should be the bad guys.

marble senior

Does he live in the IC area? He’s at all the games.

Pretty sure he lives in the burbs of the Riot.

He drives, a lot.

Lives in Cedar Rapids I think
Yes he does.

He owned a bar and a clothing shop in downtown that were both flooded.

Now he works at a telemarketing joint in Hiawatha.

Excellent put back by White after a solid screen
Ha! The pep band just played Kesha.

Take that all you people that say they are out of touch w/ today’s music.

I thought that was Katy Perry.
It was.

California Girls.

California Girls.

Not by the Beach Boys, anymore. I haz a sad.

I love that the girl in the crowd was schooled by three guys about a pop princess.
I have to keep up on pop culture to be able to talk to my students.

I don’t know what the excuse is for the other guys.

/Seriously, I hate recent pop music.

As the parent of a teen, its unavoidable for me
Hey now.

Don’t stereotype. Not all teens are that way. :]

Oh, well. Whatever. I think you are right. I don't listen to Katy Perry so it was difficult to place.

Either way it was for the last year. Give credit where credit is due.

I'm glad you don't listen to Katy Perry.

She a dog, dog.

Its likely Russell Brand was the sane one in the relationship

Which is saying something, when you think about it.

Please. Ke$ha
Refuse. And wondered if someone would call me out on that.

Answer.

Carfino'$ Way
Lulz
Negative.
C@rfon'z W@y
Nien.
Carfinoz Wa¥
Uh-uh.
That a yes?
It's a no but I don't know how to spell it.
Welp, its all I got
Well

Someone broke down.

Thought White mistimed his jump there...

I stand corrected…

Gatens in your fucking FACE.
RDM is starting to master the midrange jumper

And that is a scary fucking thing.

Switching between this and Barca game.

Messi gets held, breaks out of it, plays a magnificent through ball to Alves on the wing, hustles through some more defenders for the sliding volley and score. Best player in any sport as far as I’m concerned. I’m in love.

Anyways, back to Iowa haha.

Take the soccer to Hamdam,

this is a HAWKEYE OPEN THREDD, YO! MELSAH-ITY, NOT MESSI-NITY!!!

I bet today Mel would've swatted it.
great half

keep it up

Mel has 8 pts, 5 reb, 3 blocks at HT

Nice

I never would have thought Devyn Marble would be like this. Ever.

Let alone as a sophomore.

I agree 100%

I was really down on him most of last year.

Wow

Not bad. Now I’m excited!

Iowa up 37-26 at HT

BOOM

Well. That was better than most first halfes of basketball.
When does the wrestling meet start?
Their Matt Roth should be barred from doing stuff against us in Iowa City.

It’s not right.

That laugh is frightening.
but, but, but

where are the pancakes? HOW CAN THEY SELL BARBASOL WITHOUT PANCAKE WIFE

No kidding.

That new Barbasol commercial sucks.

He divorced her.

Too much pressure

god a new barbosol commercial

wiht a real athlete nonetheless

CASO, we need more CASO

Snowboarders are not real athletes.
more realer than previous incarnations
Um...

What?

Sorry, dude.

Coordinated stoners are cooler than me, but not athletes.

What qualifies someone as an athlete then?

The things Shaun White does with a board are pretty incredible to me.

He is one of the least attractive men I have ever seen.

I don’t care what he can do w/ a snowboard I can’t look him in the Mask-face. And button your shirt you freak.

OMG, you are so young you have know idea what the Mask reference is. Do you?
I laughed a little bit at this.
You know I'm not talking about the Jim Carey movie, right?
Jim Carrey movie correct?

I could be way off.

I believe you are off.

Otherwise I’m way off.

For the love of Christ no.

Oh well.

I tried?

You mean the one with

this chick?

Stop that, you bastard.

I wasn’t even expecting it that time.

He warned us he would do it when we least expected it.

That’s why I don’t follow his links.

Did I get you?
Yep.

NEVER AGAIN!!!

Ahhhhhhh! My eyes!

Poke them out, poke them out!

NEVER follow a KCP link.

Live and learn.

Never heard of it either

Though it is older than me, so that has to be a decent excuse.

Umm, I watch movies that are older than me.

You should watch it, it’s a good movie. I’ve probably seen it 10 times.

Difficult to watch, though,

because that kid is tough to look at.

Really, maybe after time 3 it didn't bother me so much.
Most of my favorite movies are older than me

I’m just saying that it’s a decent excuse for not having heard of something.

What's that, then? Jaws?

Kid, please.

Huh?

/I haven’t seen Jaws

He's a really cool villain in James Bond.
Oh! I thought you were talking about the movie.

I’ve seen that Jaws.

With really cool braces.
Wait a minute.

This is sarcasm right?

Yes, fully engaged sarcasm.
That was my first thought too
You're so pretty, Honey Badger.

I could never be disappointed in you.

You’re so pretty
I could never be dissaponted in you

Thanks. I get that a lot

He knows all about that cartoon and those awesome toys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQdgbs0IUDg

Sorry

[buttons shirt]

Ok I think we are being a little obtuse.
Yeah, he does it better than anyone else,

but sorry. Stoner with a board doesn’t equal athlete.

Chazz, the majority of them are NOT stoners.

They are gymnasts on snow. Ever since people started being able to make millions of dollars a year to snowboard, most of them have become SERIOUS athletes. Gym training (riding that much will kill you otherwise, and it protects against the inevitable injuries) and biofeedback exercises are common.
Seriously, go try to snowboard. Then imagine hucking yourself repeatedly off of a house sized ramp and having to have the skill to flip and spin several times before landing, knowing full well that if you mess up one time you’re facing brain injury and/or broken bones.
And with sponsors putting big money on riders’ bodies and into comp fees, they don’t let kids fuck around the way they used to be able to (when people who actually snowboarded were still putting up most of the sponsorship money). But snowboarding still makes a lot of money off of its image, and allowing the I-don’t-give-a-fuck stoner cool archetype to endure makes a bigger return on investments because their target market eats that shit up.

They are absolutely better at it than I'd ever be.

I’m not quite ready to call it gymnastics on a board, though.

It does take balance and coordination.

I’d say it’s more of a dare-devil competition than a true athletic competition.

And, as always, this is my opinion. It is fine if you don’t agree with me (I’d guess most people would not agree with me on this issue).

Okay, but you'd better take ski, jumping, luge/skeleton racing, bobsledding, curling (obviously), diving

sailing, golf (?), figure skating, NASCAR, etc off of your list of sports as well.

What is your take on downhill skiing? Is it simply careening down a hill at breakneck speed, or an athlete’s sport?

Some of those are probably what I'd call "dare-devil contests."

Perhaps save golf, diving, and sailing. I would tend to call those three (golf, diving, sailing) sports more because of their traditional categorization as such, and perhaps because of their TV coverage (ESPN made sailing famous, IIRC, golf has been on TV as a “sport” for decades, and diving has been part of the Olympics as long as I can remember).

I suppose, if that is my threshold (tradition and TV coverage), then I have to put skiing, ski-jumping, and figure skating in as sports also.

I might be more inclined to call snow-boarding or skate-boarding a sport when there is a race involved. Am I correct in thinking that there aren’t many snow-boarding events in the X-games or the Olympics that involve a “fastest time” as the main criteria? Or not?

Calling figure skating a sport but not snowboarding is quite the exercise in hair-splitting.
The first Olympic snowboarding gold was in downhill slalom.

I’ll drop it.

Good info.

You are helping me learn.

I never know whats going on, but I like it
you mean

“Knowledge makes everything simpler”
John Maeda (The Laws of Simplicity, 2006)

Truth!
it actualy an intersting tome

and you can read it in an hour and a half

John Shurna’s jumper is like…

Nice.

Your description definitely took the cake.

cake, we don't need no stinking cake,,, we need MUFFINS

The muffin man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin
Research kitchen… reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an
Intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants and brushing his scapular aside
Procceds to dump these inside of his shirt…
He turns to us and speaks:

Some people like cupcakes better. I for one care less for them!
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/f/frank+zappa/muffin+man_20056583.html ]
Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing
Anointment utensil he poots forths a quarter-ounce green rosette (oh ah yuk
Yuk… lets try that again…!) he poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosette
Near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design.
Later he says:

Some people… some people like cupcakes exclusively, while myself, I say
There is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of gods grey
Earth as that prince of foods… the muffin!

Girl you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
He hung around till you found
That he didn’t know nuthin

Girl you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin

I could use some cake, cake or cupcakes. I could go either way.
thats cause your so classy

had only my ex wife

I don't know what's going on...

but I like it. great 1st half. pleeeeeaaaaaase keep it up.

Does anyone else feel like the UI commercial with Clayborn and Tennessee Williams looks like it was made as a student project?
Yeah.

And not exactly an A+ project, either…

It aired at least a few times with "Tennessee" spelled with one "e" at the end

they fixed it eventually

By the students, for the (prospective) students.

It doesn’t look drunk enough.

I'm not familiar with t he lady author, and I'm sure she's excellent at her craft,

but cripes, she freaks me out.

Yeah, Flannery O'Connor is like that.
No

I feel like a student project would be made better.

This first half

Shows us all what this program is capable of. We are only going to keep getting better.

Good grief, my mother just said she wishes they wouldn't play Basabe.

Me: “he’s doing really well.”
My mom: “well, he missed a free throw.”
Me: “I think you should cut him a little slack.”

Wow, Mom Way is a tough judge
Good thing she wasn't coaching Shaq
Or Dwight Howard
Or Blake Griffin
She said her high school bball coach, who was also the boys coach, made them shoot until they made so many in a row.

My response was, “well, they are better than they were last year.”

So does she want Archie shot, then?
I doubt she know's which one Archie is.
My mom gets annoying like that too..

She thinks that just because she graduated from Iowa, she is THE authority on all things Iowa..

Oh no, my mom didn't graduate from Iowa.

She is hilarious to watch games w/. She gets all worked up. I love it.

Off-topic but I thought I'd share...

got the chance to see all 3 Iowa baseball games this weekend in FL. we have a good enough squad to make the Big Ten Tourney (top 6), the pitching is definitely strong from the top 3 rotation to a pretty deep bullpen. the downfall will surely be offense, which lacked timely hits and any pure real firepower with the sticks this weekend.

how many of the 3 did they win?
they picked up the win on friday against Pitt, real nasty monsoon-like weather and they pulled it out

On Saturday Notre Dame had a late rally in the 7th or so I believe and we just lacked any offense to come back. As for today, it was good all the way through. Had West Virginia tied 2-2 into the 8th, but they put two up, and our 9th rally fell short. I haven’t looked at any box scores yet but I’d say we left at least 8 men on base every game, today mostly in scoring position.

it'd be nice to have a somewhat consistent baseball team
the girl who lives across the hall from my friend is dating the #1 starter

I’m guessing he could do better

ahh yes, Jared "Hip" Hippen...

well whatever she’s doing, she needs to keep it up…he’s the ace for sure

TAKE IT TO HAMSTERDAHM
I see what you did there.

Sneaky. Snarky. I liked it.

We all realize what the true key to that first half was, right?

B-STUBBS

I dunno. I think this was Stokes first, non-garbage time minutes. Maybe it's him
The correct answer is B-STUBBS

It’s always B-STUBBS

Really huge piccolo guy did not look enthused.

And made piccolo look really small.

aaron white is good at basketball
Oh my what White almost-dunk...
That would've destroyed Carver
Remember, they said Settles was there

headfake-a-palooza

McCabe

Is awful tonight

hmm..they call that foul now after all the contact they've been allowing. odd
McCabe:

3 fouls with 2 minutes playing time.

Andrew Brommer looks on with envy
McCabe

What the hell man?

Well

This has been sloppy.

I think slop works to our favor against more talented teams.
Pat Riley on the IU bench.
Elston needs more tattoos

As he obviously hasn’t expressed himself enough with the full arm sleeve.

Y U NO LET US HAVE CROWD-PLEASING DUNKS, INDIANA?!
Not letting us have our way in the paint

Ruh roes.

Ramos putting on a good ride
Are we talking about wrestling too or is that another thread?
hell if I know
What are we, Wisconsin?
Why the hell does CHA do Jump Around?
I hate it and I think the students should boycott.
Our band teachers/leaders/majorettes/majors have no spine.

If some kid asked me if they could play Sweet Caroline, or Jump Around, or Seven Nation Army, I’d slap them with an open spit valve.

Mel is trying so hard..
R U READY FOR THE BROMMERCIDE?
Wow.

Besabe’s best game of the year?

Understatement of the Night
Stokes back in
Brommer is having a good game too.
Matt Gatens doing Matt Gatens things right now.
Someone right behind the Iowa bunch is wearing a Kentucky sweatshirt...

what the heck.

Recruit?
We wouldn't let him wear that.
I'm not sure that's a UK sweatshirt.

Might be a high school of some type.

this Indiana team scored 103 against us

Our defense is looking great tonight

Go Kia's brother.
I like being up 17 on Indiana.
TWSS
Not sure what legal age is there.

Might feel better if it was 18.

It's Indiana, I'm sure it's 17.

/They’re hicks.

16, I believe
That's only if they're related.
I meant in Iowa

If I remember that section from Criminal Law (and I may not) most of the midwest is 16. The “hick” areas like Kentucky, et al, are even younger. Kind of disturbing.

Creeping is Creepy
Yeah, might as well #TCAP the state flag
I saw us hand Bob Knight his worst loss at Indiana

The old Fieldhouse. The game was postponed a day due to a blizzard.

I remember that game.

It was glorious.

BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMER
BROOOOMMMMMMMMEEEERRRRR!!!!!
WTF is goin on? This is awesome
can we play every game at home now?
I'd rather we just play like this, regardless of where
At this point, Illinois might be willing to forfeit to us.

But Nebby wants us in the DEVANEY CENTER!!!!

Wisky visits. As does jNW.

I'm sure Indiana asks the same question after each of their road losses too.
that was a clean block
yep
It's Brommer Town, Jake.
No video tonight

Just checked the box score and it looks like Mel is going crazy. How’s it look live?

Spicy.
Like warm apple pie!
This is what I like to hear
Don't drink it! It will kill you.

Never drink the apple pie.

AWESOME
MELSANE IN THE BRAIN
INSANE IN THE MELBRAHNE!
I might need to quit if I'm making the same jokes as Chazz.
I like when you boys get along.
I was going to say something to that effect.

Sorry, but I’m “inside yo minds.”

You just out executed Ross

KF would be proud

As well as dictators everywhere
This is the best Brommer game since ISU

Last year.

I was at that game.

He was such a force…

And that was a chickenshit foul call.
This is when I start getting nervous.

Even with a 17 point lead.

i feel the same way
Who is the color man with Gus?

Cause he is rather dumb.

Not Dakich, is it?

Kinda sounds like him

But OhioHawk didn’t voice his distaste for him

Is this a Lickliter scoring drought?
I feel like he sort of inherited that from _______.
Please. His eyes started bleeding 20 minutes ago
Good job, Zach. They couldn't call them all against you.
They can if Hightower is working
Guy shoved, then bowled someone over. Glad they didn't assume it was on McCabe.
OFF-TOPIC

Michigan got Butt and Taco?!

NO FAIR

About damn time that guy got called for the foul.

He was pushing the issue for far too long.

Should T him up, too.

What is it about whiners and Indiana.

huh?
I assume you were talking about IU's Shehey,

who bitched after getting called for harrassing Marble.

Yes. Yes I was.

I misunderstood what you were saying.

He stomped his leg like a baby

And got the bug-eyes fired up, but the ref didn't react.
He's definitely Indiana's THAT GUY

Want to punch his face.

They've got two or three of them.
Elston is up there

But Sheeehey wins.

Which one has the tat half-sleeve?

He’s the worst.

I think that's Elston.
That's Elston.

I need him to get the other sleeve. He looks like a douche.

Thanks for calling the foul for running into the guy with the ball,

the second fucking time it happened.

Fans are about to storm the court

And treat these officials like they’ve been selected for “The Lottery”

4 fouls on McCabe

DRINK

Fuck that,

he lowered his shoulder way too far.

Looked worse at full speed.

That call could go either way.

that's a fucking lowered shoulder if i've seen one
When was the last time we fuckin scored???
I think I've had a beer since that time

No, seriously.

12:12

Brommer’s tip in

Just the tip though.
Giggity
Fuck these refs.

The fans here are ready to grab the torches and pitchforks.

Iowa up 15-3 thru 157 against Illinois

McD avenged his loss to Delgado, Ramos beat Futrell again, Marion won, and DSJ got a pin.

This is for 3rd place, right?

I haven’t read the Duals Open-Thread yet.

Correct

Lost to Minny

thanks!

Way to go Tony!

What are the feelings on the team if DSJ can get it going again?

I know GG is still a question, 97 is a clusterfuck, and good/bad Montell can come out at any time—but if the low weights get hot and Evans makes some noise…what’s the high water mark for us?

Question, I think you all need to let Gambrall go.

It will be easier in the end.

That's probably for the best...

It’s just that he was penciled in as a semi-finalist at worst, and his injury and the 97 or 84 decision really hurt the team chances. If he were able to come back and perform decently, maybe the point difference from him and Evans’ performance would cancel each other out?

I don't know. At least Evans is aggressive. Gambrall is killing me.
My guess is 3rd.
Matt Gatens doing senior things
Whew.

We needed that.

And the obligatory call on the other end.
MATTY KINGSBURY
YESSSS
Now go pee in the Holiday Inn lobby, you deserve it.
GATERBOMBS
I WANT TO ORDER THIS RIGHT NOW
HOLY GOD Gatens
MATT MFING GATENS

That’s a 4 point shot.

Dan Bonner,

not funny.

Gatens really wants to win this year

Something changed with him after the ISU game.

That was damn close to the beak of the tiger hawk
Have Gatens and Oglesby been reading BHGP

and the recent discussions about Kingsbury?

Anyone else notice Crossover L'Orange

a couple of possessions ago?

I dunno, he might have gota finger before the backboard
If his first name was Lebron that doesn't get called...
I'm thinking Basabe might get starting consideration after this game
Oglesby really needs to be a better FT shooter.
SOMEBODY CALL MY MAMA
Beast Mode shall now be called GOING MATT GATENS ON YOUR ASS
Gatens from EVERYFUCKINGWHERE
Ogles3

Should be a better free throw shooter. After that 1st half half-court 3, I expect more from the line.

I <3 Matt Gatens
I think I just developed a man crush on Matt Gatens
Yep, I definitely have developed a man crush on Gatens
Just wanted to say thank you

You’re easing the pain of our second half collapse.

But we still hate you, OMHR

Our pleasure.

But who will ease your pain when you bow out in round 1 or 2 of the NCAAs?

/that was mean. I sort of apologize.

Hey, second round NCAAs is a win for me this year

I’ll take it

MATTYYYY FRESSHHHHHH
He has the Gus Laugh Of Approval
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY ANYMORE
MATT MOTHERFUCKING GATENS
Marty Fresh !!!!!!!!

Holy fucking shit!

Stupid autocorrect
Hahahaha

Wasn’t he in back to the future? I hate autocorrect, but truth be told, it probably saves me more than it hurts me.

I don't know who to give MVP to.

Matt was exactly what we needed to seal this deal but BASABE JUST MADE A FREE THROW!!! Decisions, decisions…

THE WHOLE DAMN TEAM
About one or two more baskets for Gatens, and I think I have to go with Gatens.
That would put him over 30.

I don’t think there’s any question.

I wasn't sure how many he had, yet.
PV, you say Matt wanted to win after ISU

I think he’s always wanted to win, I just think something snapped in him following the PSU game.

Something snapped in me between the Nebby, jNW, and PSU games.

Probably my achilles.

When did you become a running back?

Or an Iowa womens’ bball player…

If I was a lady hoopster,

I’d have lost 4 ACLs by now.

during the penn state game even,

When he went on a similar streak

Thanks to Gatens,

I now feel good about our chances.

score please?

I’m away from a TV

67-50, Hawks.
thanks

And holy crap. Really wish I had found a way to see this one.

BTN

has replays at 12:30 CT tonight, and 3 pm CT tomorrow.

BT Network announcers

It seems like overall, the BTN announcers are better on the Basketball than the football side.

I think this is true.

They’ve hired better guys in BB than FB.

I like the in-studio crew for FB much more than BB though
Yes.

Much less Tim Doyle on the FB set.

So...I have tickets to No. 5's final game at Carver

I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself. What heart tonight

The Gatens induced Gus-gasm is just wonderful to hear
whoa.. just pulled up the gamecast..

RDM is 3 for 16 and we are winning.. what the hell

Doesn't seem like he's taken 16 shots.

huh

My thoughts exactly, I'd a thought 10 or so.
And one of his made shots

Was a double-clutch, hanging in the air, thrown from behind his head shot in the first half. It was pretty crazy.

Did they show a replay?

I don’t recall a replay of that shot.

I haven't seen one.

It was in the first half, I believe. On TV, it was on the left-side basket, on the left side, at about the elbow.

we are better when we play defense
So according to the Ted Valentine

If you’re bobbling the ball you cannot be fouled?

DUH
No kidding.

Learn the Rules!

That seems about right, for him.
I thought he was juggling for real.
No

According to Ted Valentine, “alskdjo iaajf ojwie faodjaowiej IMGONNACALLWHATEVERIWANTWHENEVERIWANT alskdjf aiejf9jejfkwaf kdjfakdjkdjf”

He goes by the NBA Jam rulebook
LOL

The nail in the…
Foul.

Matt Gatens would be dunking from half-court if that were true.
So, um, yeah.

This is great.

Assuming we win, do we knock

Indiana out of the top 25?

The overrated Big East will just knock them back in.
Fuck the big east.

Big East Basketball=SEC football. Fuck both of ’em.

Doesn't the Big East need to win a NC

more than once every 10 years to be the SEC?

Um,

UConn and Cuse have 4 in 13 or so years, right?

Does Cuse have more than the Melo?
One in the 1980s.

UConn has 3 in the last 13 years or so.

Again

the BE is “loaded” every year with the likes of G’town, Pitt, Louisville, ’Nova, etc. How many have actually cut down the nets? UConn is one of the great programs of the last quarter century. The rest of the league is living off of hype.

Okay.

Should we say the same about Florida or LSU and the others living off media hype?

The problem with that, Chazz

is that those schools actually have National Championships. Multiple, in fact.

I don't think I disagree with you too much.

Pitt and Louisville and G’town (sorry, HoyaGoon) are probably somewhat over-rated over the last 5 or 10 years.

But, the BCS system sets up the SEC schools so “all they have to do” is win one game (after 5 weeks of prep) to get the crystal football. I think the NCAA hoops tourney is a little tougher.

Facts schmacts

Filthy Spaniards, all of ’em.

I guess what I'm saying

is that, like the ACC, the Big East has a few programs that have delivered multiple times. The SEC has had (seemingly) a different school step up and win every year. The Big East’s reputation seems to be built on the body of work of just a few schools. Check out how many get bounced in the first weekend this year (just like last year…and the year before, and the year before…)

Fair enough.

But, the BCS is set up for the SEC. Big East schools still have to win 6 games over 3 weekends to win the whole thing.

I guess my problem is

when a league has 16-17 teams, I’m going to look really hard at a school from that conference that gets an at-large with a 9-9 mark in league play. Why? Because despite the 10 “good” teams, every squad will get at least 5-8 games against absolute trash (DePaul, S. Florida, Rutgers, etc.) to pad that record.

You have seen

the awesome SEC football teams at Ole Miss, Kentucky, Tennessee (recently), Vandy?

Chazz, I do agree with this concept in general.

The only issue is that, more times than not (except this year, seriously, fuck you BCS), the SEC teams that make it smoke the competition.

Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust

a bit outside.

Hey guys! Apparently Matt Gatens is trending on tweeter!

Everyone to the twitter-mobile!

He better win Big Ten player of the week
"This game becoming a wrestling match match down the stretch..."

IF ONLY, GUS. IF ONLY.

Sheehey is like Jake Kelly's evil twin brother.

And Hulls, YOU SUCK!

There is no doubt in my mind that Elston knows a thing or two about rohypnol.
He's playing on it, right now.
He drinks it like Gatorade during time-outs.
and being a big, ugly doucheburger
That's s funny shit.
I wonder how often he goes tanning
I think Crean does.
I hate Matt Roth.

I never thought I would utter those words.

I would pay many dollars to see a Matt Roth cage fight.

No rules, no tap outs.

Gatens has never been Big Ten Player of the Week

whaaaaaaaaaaa

MATTY FRESH
WHY IS ANYONE ELSE TOUCHING THE BALL

Give it to Matt and let him get fouled and sink some FU free throws.

Oh, Gater's daddy is so proud!!
Fun fact:

Gatens and I were on the same Little League All-Star team. I once saw Mike Gatens cuss out the State Tournament director. I might have been 12 and I forget the exact wording, but it was something to the tune of “This is bullshit. Go fuck yourself.” And he is not a small man.

That'll be me someday
Matt "GettinBuckets" Gatens.
What is Christopher Walken's creepy younger brother doing in front of Mr. Gatens?
The Weapon of Choice?

Gatens dad looks much like he did in 1975
Unbeliveable

Can’t believe we’re having clock problems.

At CHA?

NO WAY

Don't you knowwww pump it up!

And CHA clock issues again? Yes, CHA clock issues again.

Who would have thought!?!?!
I WANT 80!!!

10-1 when we score 80. That 1? At Bloomington…

Errr 9-1

I want 10-1.

Let Gatens take a 3
Now thats is classy

Fran not even taking a shot

And Mr. Windowless-Van goes down and shoots a three in response
I completely agree,

despite my previous statement.

Bielema disagrees.
The card sez gofer tew
If my math is correct,

Gatens has just passed Jeff Horner to move into 11th on the all-time scoring list. with 1503.

Sportsmanship sucks.

Shoot a 3 Matt!

That's why we drink it here, kids.
Suck it IU. Iowa is now a "bad loss" on your resume.
HAWKS WIN! HAWKS WIN! HAWKS WIN!
Iowa has Illinois beat baring points being taken away

up 25-3. everyone won except Kelly. huzzah

Good lord, that would need to be A LOT of points taken away.
Wow. Just wow.

Which Iowa team shows up next?

IN HEAVEN THERE IS NO BEER.
This Iowa basketball season has to be the craziest of all time

seriously. absolutly nuts. the tale of two teams

We probably don't win today if we beat penn st

I’ll take this trade off

Hey, we're still ahead of Illinois in the B1G standings.
How much you want to bet

that Tom Crean doesn’t blame his players for the loss in the presser?

If I was him, I'd blame that butt-cut on my head.
I wonder if he takes it in "the hair".

(please have a student make this sign for next year)

So?

(am reveling in this fact)

Matt Gatens is totally trending in the United States

Fantastic.

That is kinda cool.
The fact that the game was on BTN makes it even cooler
the game was on CBS too apparently

the whole nation saw his game.

Wagner lost 11-6

but he probably wins the 197 spot anyway

Missed the game, just saw now that we won

This is the most schizophrenic Iowa basketball team that I can remember. Wow. Very nice win.

Even Dolph calling Gatens Gater can't bother me tonight

What an outstanding effort by a great Hawkeye!

I'm behind the "Gater" moniker

so long as it’s in reference to the Burt Reynolds role.

/Archer’d

Iowa is 3-3 vs. Top 25 teams

The rest of Iowa is 2-8. Naturally, ISU has accounted for 4 losses, but has at least accounted for 1 win.

Telford wins with a decision

Iowa dominated Illinois.

Dont quote me, but i think Minny beat OK State too. not sure though

oh my bad

OK State vs Minny is in its last match. Minny has the lead

So I'm late to this party.

What are we drinking?

It's only right...

Is that a Beerection?
From the ladn of sky blue waters,,,,,
Essentially 7 and 7

Got people over tonight so I’m not going to be around here much, but this was a great win

Alesmith Speedway Stout

jelly?

Iowa wins 3rd place at the National Duals

Beats Illinois 28-6

Minnesota beat OK State 18-13, and win National Duels

well damn

Damn dirty gophers
If it had to be Minnesota or OSU, then I'm glad it was Minnesota.
I can see the logic

It was like the superbowl for me. I wanted both teams to lose.

Honestly, i think Iowa would have beaten OK State too

just looking at how guys performed

Oddly enough, I prefer that result
Ok, so what's the record now with this win?
We are 14-13 overall,

and 6-8 in the Big Ten. Tied for 7th in the B10 with jNW.

Thank you.

How many games left (not including the B1G tourney)?

Its nice to see basketball showing signs of life…

4 games left.

Wisky visits,

@Illinois

@Nebby

jNW visit.

i lighting the votive candles

for threee out of four

It would be nice to finish the regular season with a winning record...
I know every team has "what ifs"

But if Iowa had played a bit better against PSU and Nebraska, they’d be 16-11 and 8-6. So even though it won’t happen this year, they’re pretty damn close to being a bubble team. In one of the toughest B1G years in recent memory, no less.

Some Iowa guys worth mentioning in wrestling

Ramos beat Futrell, Carter, and Dardanes, hell of a Duels he had, never got beat

Lofthouse beat Storley and Blanton, and was undefeated in all matches

Marion went undefeated and beat Mangrum and Dardanes

McD went undefeated and beat Sanders and Delgado

those four had really good tournaments. bravo

Sounds like Lofthouse has come a long way since midseason.

Hopefully he continues his improvement through championships.

he's so erratic

but “erratic” necessarily means there is good with the bad. If he has eliminated the bad part of it, he’s definitely shown that he can be good.

3-3 against ranked opponents this year

at least that’s what the AP story says.

Beat Wisky, Michigan, IU

Lost to OSU, MSU, and IU (Purdue isn’t currently ranked).

AHEM

Post-game Thread

Was wondering if it was Junior Senior time

Also, I just heard that song at Target yesterday. BHGP has powers, people.

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